Being Twenty Something

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you
stop going along with the crowd and start realizing
that there are a lot of things about yourself that
you
didn't know and may not like. You start feeling
insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or
two, but then get scared because you barely know
where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that,
maybe, those friends that you thought you were so
close to aren't exactly the greatest people you
have ever met and the people you have lost touch
with are some of the most important ones. What
you do not realize is that they are realizing that too
and are not really cold or catty or mean or
insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what
you thought you would be doing or maybe you are
looking for one and realizing that you are going to
have to start at the bottom and are scared. You
miss the comforts of college, of groups, of
socializing with the same people on a constant
basis. But then you realize that maybe they
weren't
so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what
you want and do not want. Your opinions have
gotten stronger. You see what others are doing
and find yourself judging a bit more than usual
because suddenly you realize that you have
certain boundaries in your life and add things to
your list of what is acceptable and what is not.

You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and
cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel
alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change
is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past
with dear life but soon realize that the past is
drifting further and further away and there is
nothing to do but stay where you are or move
forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how
someone you loved could do such
damage to you or you lie in bed and wonder why
you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to
know better. You love someone but maybe love
someone else too and cannot figure out why you
are doing this because you are not a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to
look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an
idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the
same emotions and questions over and over and
talk with your friends about the same topics
because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future
and making a life for yourself and while winning
the race would be great, right now you'd just
like to be a contender! What you may not realize
is
that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in
our best of times and our worst of times, trying
as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.